Men are like stars... only one can make your dreams come true.
A woman needs four animals in her life: a mink in the closet, a Jaguar in the driveway, a tiger in bed, and a jackass to pay for it all.
God created man first because you have to have a rough draft before you create a masterpiece.
A man is never worth your tears, and the one who is won’t make you cry.
If women knew what we were thinking, they’d never stop slapping us.
A woman has the last word in any argument. Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.
A man is a person who will pay two dollars for a one-dollar item he wants. A woman will pay one dollar for a two-dollar item that she doesn’t want.
Women have their faults. Men have only two: Everything they say and everything they do.
The way to a man’s heart is through his stomach, the way to a woman’s heart is through his wallet.
One woman is fair, yet I am well; another is wise, yet I am well; another virtuous, yet I am well; but till all graces be in one woman, one woman shall not come in my grace.
Women and cats do what they do; there is nothing a man can do about it.
Dancing is a perpendicular expression of a horizontal desire.
Behind every successful man is his woman. Behind the fall of a successful man is usually another woman.
I don’t get all the women that I want, I get all the women that want me.
If all the girls who attended the Yale prom were laid end-to-end, I wouldn’t be a bit surprised.
The best for a man and the best for a woman is not the same.
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